This fall, NEA provides helpful information in the battle against high stakes testing. Follow this link to discover a simple “widget” in which you can easily contact your representative regarding reducing the federal role in testing. You are able to choose representative and senators and edit your message for either e-mail or a printed letter.

Because, despite our best efforts, we are still captive by high-stakes testing, NEA offers a humorous take on how to deal with these stresses. An excerpt from the “survival guide” is below, but you can read the entire article here.

Educator Scenario:

How to Survive Standardized Testing (Clearly Created by Alien Life Forms)

One teacher says on weekends she “wines” a little. She’s fond of Chardonnay. Another says she “protests.” She’s from Seattle. All teachers say they object. They’re from planet Earth, and they realize the standardized testing regime is unfair, unreasonable, and untenable. But until a better method for assessment is finally put into practice, educators have figured out some methods to thwart stress.

First, do not panic. Stress and tests don’t mix and you want your students to be comfortable, even if you aren’t.

Christopher Carey admits to finding testing more stressful than many of his students do. “How very unfortunate: They’re used to it,” he says.

For those who still struggle, help them relax.

“I help my students mellow out by playing games with them during testing weeks,” says Elisheva Creve. “Their brains need a break so they can think clearly.”

Michelle Drummond Mayo advises tapping into what called you to the profession. “Teach, teach, teach with all your heart, and when testing time comes, rev up your students and pack them full of enthusiasm and confidence,” she says. “I always tell my kids we’re going to show the people in Little Rock (our state capitol) what we can do!”

Christy Mansfield tries to model “standing up for what’s right” behavior by not teaching to the test, but around the tests.

According to The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook, most UFO sightings are in rural areas, away from bright lights, and near military installations. Tests, on the other hand, are ubiquitous, and survival strategies must be developed by all educators, everywhere. UFO sightings occur most frequently during the summer months, around 9 p.m., with a secondary peak at around 3 a.m. Although testing occurs most frequently in spring, for several hours during consecutive weeks, test prep is perpetual. Vigilance is required.